Liberals treat dogs like people, Conservatives treat people like dogs

Saturday, November 29

Free the Beatles

Did you know the Beatles don't own their catalogue? Did you know their record company doesn't own their catalogue? Do you know who does? Not John, Paul, George, or Ringo. Nope, the majority of their catalogue belongs to some crazyguy. No, not just crazy, but rich. Did you know, for example, that if Paul McCartney releases a live album, not unlike he just did... he has to pay royalties to the rich guy? A crazy, weird, rich, possible felon guy. Gee... I wonder what such a thing would look like. Right, when a Beatles song gets recorded... the Beatles don't get paid... they pay. They pay crazy rich guy. Guess what? Wanna ruin a brilliant socio-political rant like "Revolution" by throwing it into a commercial for a tennis shoe? Well you can, and the Beatle's have no say. You just write a check to crazy rich guy. What is kookier still is that this crazy rich guy isn't rich anymore. He is very deep in dept. His house has several liens on it, so he no longer owns it. He owes money to a buttload of people, and is jobless. Oh yeah, crazy rich guy is out on bail right now from JAIL. The reason I write is because of this, crazy rich guy is unemployed for the first time since he was 7. His only asset left is the Beatles catalogue, which some say Sony has already put a lien on. Some reports say he still owes $260 Million to his former employer. The reason I write is the hopes that crazy, rich, weird, possible felon guy will have to sell the Beatles catalogue back to Sony quite soon to pay for what Johnny Cochran said "could possibly the biggest trial in the history of the United States". Well, if crazy rich guy has to pawn his Beatles collection back to Sony... maybe someone else could buy it... like THE BEATLES. Now there are many a story from the McCartney camp that he has been trying to do this for years but Yoko Ono is a difficult and spiteful business woman who refuses to work with Paul. We can go into that another time, but if you want some history on that, do a google search on the songwriting credit history of 'Yesterday'. So, in a nutshell, screw Micheal Jackson... let's give the Beatles back to Paul.

Tuesday, November 25

Social Darwinism

Survival of the fittest. This is a terrific little nug from CNN. Now I am not a fan of racists. Racism is wrong because the only time it is acceptable to judge people without knowing them first is if they are Republican. Anyhow, instead of saying racists are dumb of making a southerner joke... I will let the verbiage of the headline speak for itself - JOHNSON CITY, Tennessee (AP) -- A bullet fired in the air during a Ku Klux Klan initiation ceremony came down and struck a participant in the head, critically injuring him, authorities said. There it is folks, 31 years of my accumulated wisdom on earth couldn't say it better than that: guns are dangerous, racism is wrong, and there is something not quite right about the south. Make sure you click the link and read the story, because miraculouslly this story also involves paint guns, and them hanging each other. Geesh, if only I was a stand up comedian... I could get 15 minutes out of this.

Sunday, November 23

Reality Television

Listen, I don't watch reality TV. Seriously, I am above it. It is fabricated entertainment for small minds. That being said, I am furious that Rupert was voted out. In the five years that I have not been watching reality tv (but instead devoting my time to the arts and charity), Rupert was the best Survivor in the history of the game. That being said, Johnny Fairplay is a toolbox who should be fed to pirahnas.