Liberals treat dogs like people, Conservatives treat people like dogs

Friday, February 6

At what point does it become assassination? PT l

Honestly, I know I am treading on careful water... but at what point does someone getting shot become an assassination? I must be careful to even type these words, but this is an open discussion. If John Kerry were to be shot, that would surely be an assassination, right? However, if Dennis Kucinich were to be shot... it would just be reported that he was shot. I guess all I have to say about this is - if I am ever shot, please be a dear and report to the media that I was not shot but assassinated. Also, make sure the papers know the middle name of whoever shot me. Oh yeah, one last thing: have some Neil Diamond playing in the background. I am so tired of rock stars being tried for causing suicide (Ozzy, Judas Priest, Negativland, and Marilyn Manson have all been accused and acquitted). So for once someone should point the blame squarely where it lies > Englebert Humberdink!

What's the deal with middle names and assassins? PT ll

Think of all the people famous for killing. They all have three names: john wayne gacy, lee boyd malvo, john allen mohammed, lee harvey oswald, john wilkes booth... etc. I would bet that every single one of them went by two names just like you and me. Then, for reasons only the media knows, they are branded forever with their middle names. Why is this? Is this is so we can dis-associate ourselves from them? Is this so we can tell ourselves "well, shit, my Mark would never kill somebody. He's just Mark Chapman, a Beatles fan. But then one day dude goes nuts and shoots John Lennon hours after meeting him and getting his autograph he decides to return and wait for John to return from the studio. Now dude is Mark David Chapman. Anyhow, just a warning, everyone you know has a middle name. How come nobody ever gave Charlie Manson a middle name? I also gotta notice most of these guys wear eyeglasses too. By they way, on a nearly unrelated tangent... here is a website for a guy who honestly believes that Steven King killed John Lennon under orders from Ronald Reagan disseminated in code. Warning, this is not a gag site... or the Onion. Dude believes this stuff.

Friday Fives

1. What vehicle do you drive? Toyota Tacoma 2. How long have you had it? this is my second one 3. What is the coolest feature on your vehicle? the locking rear differential (four wheeling term). It has got me out of some hairy shit in the woods 4. What is the most annoying thing about your vehicle? horrible gas mileage 5. If money were no object, what vehicle would you be driving right now? the same thing I have, but it would be paid off and have bigger tires via Friday Fives.

Thursday, February 5

The President is appalled

My wife awoke me this morning laughing. I asked her what she was laughing about and she explained that Bush just ranted about the courts taking matters in their own hands and how upset he was about it. He said "... if judges insist on forcing their arbitrary will upon the people, the only alternative left to the people would be the constitutional process." Do you believe that? Am I the only seeing the irony here? More importantly... am I the only reading this? Our president was installed by a court, NOT the constitutional process (ie voting). Apparently he is all upset about gay marriage. Why does he care, and whose business is it? If two people love each other, let them get married. You can't legislate morality... unless you live in Utah. Kudos to Mass for taking such a brave and progressive stance on the issue.

Offshoring - an update

Well, we have some interesting information here. Tech TV reports that 200 of the Fortune 500 outsource calls to India. Why? The math is terribly simple... the call takers make between $3,000 to $5,000 a year. Whereas ours (assuming at $10 an hour) make $20,800. Crap! We can't possibly compete with that. Anyone need a music writer or blog editor for hire? My man Haji is putting my resume online this week. Stay warm...