Liberals treat dogs like people, Conservatives treat people like dogs

Thursday, September 23

Friday Fives

1. If you were to prepare a meal that revealed your soul, what would you prepare and why? Well, I am crazy for chicken. If left to my own devices I would probably eat chicken every day and every meal. What? You callin' me yellow? I don't have to prove anything to you, so just bug off! 2. What says "romance" to you? um... honestly? the stuff I have to do before I get to have sex. Don't tell my wife I said that. The other bliss I have is driving through and around the Rockies. 3. If you were to run for mayor of our fair city, what would your platform and pet projects/reforms be and why? Well, I gotta say I am genuinely pleased with John Hickenlooper so far. That being said we have some pressing issues to deal with. First off, too many high school kids are dying in car crashes. I would put legislation into effect that says 1. no passengers under 18 until you are over 18. * 2. Seatbelt is more than the law. Every one of these kids would still be alive if they were wearing seatbelts. If you are under 18, I would make not wearing seatbelts an offense that would pull your drivers license (even if you are the passenger). Lastly, we have a problem with our police shooting minorities who are innocent (I mean really innocent. One was because the police raided the wrong address and the homeowner tried defending himself, another was someone holding a soda can in bed, and a third was a mentally deficient 13 year old boy in the house, by himself, with a knife. All three were shot and killed. There needs to be some re-training, at the least. I should say that I believe our mayor is working on these issues as we speak.

* this just in - Denver lawmakers are writing this into a bill as we speak on this issue. I just heard it on the news this morning. I am a freakin' prophet! 4. Someone presents you with a working voodoo doll. Do you use it? On who, why, and to what purpose? Well, that would have to be the president. I would make him apologize for all the lying he has done strictly to further corporate interests. I mean, I know that men that powerful aren't to be trusted or believed. I also know that at that level one must have sacrificed nearly everything regarding integrity to form alliances that are necessary. It's is also ok to be rich and successful and powerful. Not at the cost of others, though. However, I honestly can't see a good bone or spec of good intention in our president... and that bums me. So, I would find a way to make him be honest, for once. Man, why was I born with compassion and reason? Maybe I'll be reborn as a Republican, that is what happens if you don't lead a good and virtuous life, you know? Yup, try following the eightfold path my friends. That is my goal every day. Nearly every day. 5. If you came upon a time machine, where would you go? Would you alter anything? Why? First let me say I would never alter anything, even if it were to stop an injustice. I guess y'all haven't seen 'Back to the Future', but there are grave consequences to messing with the future. Now, I am going to limit my choices to something regarding rock. That being said, I would choose to hang out with either Bob Dylan for year in the early 60s... or Led Zeppelin on tour in the early 70's. Bob has made the greatest musical life impact on me... on the other hand, the Zep had a friggin jet! Well, I guess there are a few musical wrongs I would like to right - Speaking of the Zep and altering the future... Bonzo died with 27 screwdrivers in his belly (the vodka drink, not the tool). It was a daytime meeting for the band, discussing the future and their plan for the 80s. Now, Bonzo was a world famous drinker... but 27 screwdrivers? If I could go back I might have been the guy to slow him down around 6 - 10 tops! Ok, one other thing I had to have stepped in on - the Lynyrd Skynard plane crash. It wasn't drugs, or a snowstorm, or even bad visibility that killed most of Skynyrd. brace yourself - the plane ran out of gas! That hurts because it is so very very preventable. The plane crashed into some trees, and never hit the ground after the crash. Couldn't the pilot have noticed they were low on fuel? Maybe aim for a highway or a field?

Here is another one. I might tell John Lennon that author Steven King is going to kill him.

One last thing - I might have said something like this (you guess the context). "You know guys, I wouldn't sign that if I were you. I don't know that Axl really has your best intentions in mind on this one." via Roy now, please click 'comments' and add your own answers to today's fives.

Register to Vote today

Hey all, there isn't a lot of time left to register to vote for the upcoming election. The deadline is in a week and a half. Because you are lazy, and I am ok with that... I have a couple of terrific web resources for you and your friends to assist. As always, there are the good folks at Also, there is a super cool group here that will actually hook you up with free MP3s for registering to vote, and for getting friends to register to vote. There is a lot at stake for this election, even if you aren't chasing the presidential race. Here in Colorado there is a big race for the senate which is expected to assist in changing the entire balance of power in congress. That is pretty important stuff, friends... so please choose a side and support them. Also, most states (including Colorado) allow you to register to vote at the DMV. Of course, problem with that is the Colorado DMV is closed all week because of some computer glitch non-sense. Here is more incentive, if you don't vote... my vote counts for both of us.

Monday, September 20

It's all true

This report comes from New Orleans. Mailers are being distributed that if Democrats win the presidency, they will ban the Bible. We didn't want this to get around... but the whole thing is true. Part the of the secret Democratic plan for America is three fold.
1. ban the bible 2. take away everyone's guns 3. make everyone get gay married
there it is. Frankly, I am not pleased this has come to light... but facts are facts. Please, vote Republican to keep all the queers from taking over. I mean sure, the Dems plan to raise taxes on working folks and quadruple welfare for lazy minorities. We are downy soft on terror, and in fact all of George Soros' money comes from drug runners. Don't let any of that concern you... because after we have disarmed the populace (just like Hitler did) you all will be unable to form a militia... which is your consitutional right! Yep, us liberals are going turn this place into a commie wasteland.