Liberals treat dogs like people, Conservatives treat people like dogs

Monday, January 17

Oops, I did it again

What, you ask? I solved another one of your silly problems. I got a guy for you for Homeland Security. Jesse Ventura. He has a history of public service and is a Republican. Also, he speaks his mind totally and completely... I like that. Also, dude was a Navy Seal! Do you have any idea how hardcore those guys are? You don't. You can't even imagine because you are a pussy just like me. The Seals are the smartest and toughest human resource in the world. He has a million times more charm and charisma than Ridge did, so he can help schmooze and smooth our image. Oh, and as a wrester, dude can clearly pretend to kick ass. This adminstration could use all of those attributes.

In closing, I offer thanks to Dr King and his family for their contributions to all Americans. What Dr King did was for more than blacks, but for all Americans. We owe him a debt, and this is my small pittance and thanks.

Sunday, January 16

Martin Luther King day

I want to take a second to celebrate Martin Luther King day today. I don't have a lot of time to write much, and I hope to offer better submissions after my vacation regarding Black History Month for February. I am honestly very crunched for time, and am only down here because I am doing laundry for a trip. However, so as not to slight Dr. King and his work, I offer my high school grad paper in it's entirety. I was vice president for our black caucus in High School. Yeah, it was a pretty white school.

Why Martin Luther King is my hero, in 100 words. I want you to know that Martin Luther King died fighting for what he believed in. He fought for the right to sit on that bus, instead of being sent to the back with the other colored. Also, his non violence is more than just an idea. Too many, pacifism in the face of rage & violence against you and your people is unthinkable. However, Dr King maintained it. When he was filmed being beaten by those police officers, he did not resist. MLK's famous words that day were 'Can't we all just get along?'. Indeed, poignant. Let's not also forget that incident was the inspiration for U2's breakthrough hit 'Pride, in the name of Love'. Anyhow, that is why I admire Martin Luther King very very very very very much. 100 words, count it!

Anyhow, that is all I have time for. To be serious, for February I will do some acknowledgement of my favorite black cultural heroes: Nelson Mandela, Bobby Seale, Huey Newton (founders of the Black Panthers), Nelson Mandela, and perhaps something you might learn about Harry Belafonte too. Thanks, and have a great week. It will be a bit before you hear from me again. Don't panic, I'm just out gathering material to stay fresh and witty (hint, that is sly talk for court mandated drug rehab).