Liberals treat dogs like people, Conservatives treat people like dogs

Thursday, May 25





good







Monday, May 22

are you possessed?

People magazine isn't exactly pulitzer material, but I don't consider them crazies or liars. That being said, the wonderul folks at People magazine did an essay so that you, the reader, can know if someone is possessed. This was in Sept 2005, for you purists out there. Anyhow, as a joint public service message from 'I am Correct' and 'People magazine' here is how to tell if you are possessed:

an aversion to crosses or holy water
superhuman strength
sudden ability to speak new languages
spitting glass or nails,
levitation

If you find yourself, or a loved one, displaying these characteristics... immediately consult a doctor, clergy, people magazine. You are welcome.

Now I remember

Last week, a study came out about the road ragiest places in America. Florida won.I was recently in Florida, and had an amazing time. It was my first time there, see. Anyhow, I saw something the likes I had never seen before. I think it may speak to the issues Florida drivers are having. We were cruising up the freeway from the Florida Keys towards Miami. I mean, we were crusing... folks don't drive slow there.

I was relaxind and inspecting all the hurricane damage as we cruised along. I looked over to my right and saw something. We were in the fast lane, see, and I was in the passenger seat. In the lane next to us was an old lady in an economy car. She was doing about 75 mph along side us. She was alone in the car, and reading a paperback novel. She had the novel braced against the center portion of the steering wheel.

Keep in mind, she was not glancing intermittantly at said book. No, her focus was completely and entirely on that little novel. Thing is, she was also piloting a very fast 3,000 pound car. I wish I had a picture of that moment... but my camera was in the trunk. I would be a zillionaire if I had that picture, because then you would believe me. I would have sold that picture to the road rage report people to use as a cover for their book on road rage.

Anyhow, I thought I would share that as my personal insight into why Florida drivers are so angry.