Liberals treat dogs like people, Conservatives treat people like dogs

Friday, May 21

Friday Fives

1. What are your favorite magazines, including the embarrassing ones? Rolling Stone -which gets worse every year. Carlos put it best when he called it 'people magazine for hipsters'. Also like Playboy a lot... and for the articles. They have really good writing, and the naked women in between certainly don't hurt things. I started getting a free subscription to US World News, which is the biggest piece of Republican shit on the market to mask itself as journalism. I'd cancel the subscription, but my cat needs somewhere to aim when he craps. 2. What is the funniest thing you have ever said? tough to say, I am a funny guy. This is one I have been sadly proud of. After eating a terrible breakfast at the Waffle House in Parker... I came up with a new name for the place - the Awful House. Is milk shooting out your nose yet? Lemme think on that one, and get back to you. My writing gets a little better every day... so go through the archives and read some pieces and I promise you'll laugh. It's not like you're working right now. 3. What is the best movie you have NEVER seen this year. Monster - with hottie Charlize Theron as crazed serial murderer Eileen Wurnos. It's in the Netflix queue. I don't see movies in the theatres unless it is something HUGE... like Lord of the Rings. I am a cheap bastard. 4. If you were a boardgame, which one would you be? Dunno. I like Cranium, because you use all your faculties to play it. So, let's just say Cranium... though it sounds a bit nerdy don't you think? Oh well, what do you expect from a 32 year old virgin? If I had any friends, I imagine we'd play Cranium all the time. 5. Tell us how to make your favorite sandwich. Pay close attention here, folks. You might want to print this one out and bring it to Safeway. Yes, Safeway is in the sammich business and there is no need for you to keep going to Subway. Start with white bread, mayo both sides lightly. Turkey & Roast Beef, should be ruffled to give sammich body. Lettuce & tomato of course. Provolone on top, plus some sprouts (which are very tough to get these days because of health concerns). Now here is the topper, and it is critical - Italian dressing (or any kind of vinaigrette). It gives flavor and punch to the sammich. As Roy says: Here, go, do! via Roy


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