Liberals treat dogs like people, Conservatives treat people like dogs

Friday, July 30

Friday Fives

1. What were you like in high school? How have you changed? I was a long hair hessian. A generic 16 year old rebel for the most part. You know, didn't like Republicans, didn't like music that didn't involve satan, didn't like authority. However, never really did drugs. I should qualify that, I ate a lot of acid and read a lot of Kerouac. I worked and read and taught myself to play guitar. All in a bid to score chicks, which I recommend. But was pretty clean other than that. I mostly remember working a lot. I have worked always since I was 15 > Jack in the Box, KFC, local grocery chain (bag boy), bus boy, mowed lawns, cleaned pools, canvases for Greenpeace ... all that sorta stuff. How have I changed? The hair is gone (not so much by choice, really), but my passion for a liberal and happy society hasn't changed. I am still a total music nut too. Personality wise, my friends would say I am the same. Funny, crazy, strange, and happy. 2. What are some of the worst meals you've had in your life? I wish I had some cool jail stories here, but alas I do not. The most consistantly bad food I can ever remember eating was when I was working at Echostar after my second lay off (about two years ago). Because the economy wasn't good, and our president is a total fuck-off who was more concerned about tax breaks for big corporations... we started saving for another potential lay off (which came, 8 months into the job). So, I was eating discount frozen food lunches every day. They were Banquet, and are still on the market at every store. They genereally run less than a dollar a piece and let me tell you they are overcharging. After a week or two of this crap, I started to keep salt and pepper in my locker in the warehouse to make the Banquets vaguely palatable. Someone stole them after two days... probably someone eating those Banquet dinners too. This i great, in researching for this piece to create that hyperlink above, I learn that Conagra is Banquet's parent company. They aren't quite as evil as Monstantos, but are nipping at the heels of patenting all foods you eat. 3. What hand puppet is most, or least, likely to enhance masturbation? Without revealing too much, I am quite fond of my 'Gigundo Gina and Bodacious Brandy beach babe set' doll that I keep here in the office (for research). 4. What famous people did you have crushes on when you were growing up? I had a thing for Kim Bassinger for quite a while. Then it was Michelle Pheiffer. I can not even pretend to say I am out of the whole Madonna crush, and I had a brief mental affair with Lita Ford. Oh, and Sting. When I was however old I was when Synchronicity came out (probably 8 or 10 or something) I used to listen to it constantly. I still binge like that with music. Anyhow, my big brother Johnny took me to see the Police on that tour and it was the greatest thing in the world. For months after, I wanted to write the band a letter telling them how great they were. I also remember thinking how stupid this was. Then recently I was at the EMP thingy in Seattle and they had all these letters from teenagers written to the Beatles. 5. How did you quit (insert addiction here, NOT restricted to drugs!)? Addiction? Well, I have never really been a smoker or drug person. Though I am not against smoking or drugs in certain situations. I used to drink a lot, but I kept putting on weight so at the very least I no longer drink on schooldays. I am still a big proponent of masturbation, but I haven't quit that yet... so I'll have to keep you posted. I thought maybe marriage would cure it... nope. My newest addiction is coffee. I am drinking about 5 cups a day and it barely phases me. What this means is that I need to stop drinking coffee totally for about two weeks, but that is a bitch. I have to do it about once a year to keep my tolerance from getting too high. * in closing, I'd like add these comments to my arch-rival/ nemesis 'Roy'. First; nice questions, are you a cop or something? Secondly, my parents may read this, asshole. I've got drugs, masturbation, crime, and... bad nutrition in writing here. via Roy


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