They make a great margarita

God, I hate that sentence. I really do. I have been putting up with it far too long. First off, there is no such thing as a good margarita. Margarita's are disgusting and the only reason people drink them is to get drunk quick. That being said, no one makes a great margartita. They are all made exactly the same, so stop with that stupid comment. It is tequila, and that green stuff. Same way, everywhere. Now, your favorite bar may make a particularly strong margarita, and that is swell of them. That doesn't make it a good drink though, just a strong one.

Trust me, I am a professional drinker. Also, your bar may have great deals on margaritas. That is terrific, but it does not make the drink itself great. No, it makes it a great deal. Listen up, America. Tequila is nasty, and so is that green stuff they add. You wanna know how to make a great drink? Here it is. One part Malibu Rum to one part Bacardi 151. Fill with Sprite, and top off with a splash of grenadine. That's my drink, and it is great! It is strong as hell but tastes yummy like a chick drink. I invented it in college, and it's called the Lono. If you step into a bar in Flagstaff, Arizona... go ahead and order yourself one. Tell them I sent you.