the Kate Moss scandal

I have been cleared by legal to finally discuss publically the Kate Moss cocaine scandal. Turns out, Kate Moss has been doing peruvian modeling powder and got caught. The fashion world is freaked out, and she lost a buttload of endorsements. How do they think she stayed at 85 pounds? A supermodel doing blow is NOT a scandal. Frankly, a supermodel not doing blow is a scandal. I mean, why wouldn't you do blow if you were them? They have unlimited money, partying is a legitimate part of their duties, and they have to stay impossibly thin to stay employed?

I think it is time to start testing American models. If they test negative to blow, they lose their contract. On the other hand, that might explain why Kate Moss was in the alley behind my house selling car speakers last weekend. Weird.