Liberals treat dogs like people, Conservatives treat people like dogs

Thursday, October 13

Friday Fives

1. Have you ever been to the emergency room?

oh yes, plenty of times. Several leg injuries, and twice as a kid I cracked my head open. Plus, there was the time I had a cerebral hemorrage. Cool, huh!

2. What's the worst pain you've ever had?

golly, I am guessing you mean physical pain? That would be the night/ morning after I tore my ACL at a rock concert. I was able to walk the rest of the night, no biggie. It just felt sore. Late that night I woke up to pee and couldn't get out of bed. My left knee was totally immobile. It hurt so bad. Also, I had a stick shift so I couldn't even drive to the doctors office. I had to have emergency surgery a few days later.

3. If you could choose your doctor, do you prefer someone of the same or opposite sex?

same sex, absolutely not negotiable. I wouldn't want a woman doctor looking at my privates. it would be too weird. Plus, what if she was hot? Then I have the whole erection concern because I watched too many p0rn stories that involve dirty nurses. Plus, lets say I have a rash on my nuts. I don't... so stop asking. But what if I did? How do you explain that to a woman without feeling super creepy?

4. Do you take vitamins?

yup. I drink a protein and vitamin shake every morning. Then I have a meal replacement shake for breakfast. Sounds healthy, huh? It is, except for lunch and dinner I drink 16 ounces of bacon grease too.

5. Would you prefer to go to the doctor, the dentist or go sky diving?

doctor. I am nailing this hotty nurse practitioner at my doctors office. Actually, skydiving. Before I die I want to see the Aurora and parachute.


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