Liberals treat dogs like people, Conservatives treat people like dogs

Thursday, January 25

Friday Fives

1. It has been a tedious week. What is your best advice to overcome self pity.

sleep. Only sleep gives me a fresh outlook on stuff. Sometimes I lie in bed with regret, sometimes stupid stuff... sometimes heavy stuff. In the morning, all is forgotten and my hound dog 'Rufus' is usually licking my nose. That is Rufus up above, instead of a mandala. You can't be mad at the world or yourself when a puppy is licking your nose to wake you up. You can, however, be mad at the Rufus

. 2. What is your favorite Trivial Pursuit category (real or imagined.)

Well, Tom, I have to go with an imaginary one here. Rock & Roll history.

3. Would you rather turn into Sammy Davis, Jr. when masturbating - or- have the AOL "You've got mail" guy announce your ejaculations?

the second one, because Sammy Davis had a glass eye. I can't masturbate to that. What if he pulls it out and tries to show it to me (the eye, I mean)?

4. What do you remember about your first day of school?

Strangely, I remember it quite well... even though I don't remember hardly anything after that. It was the first day of kindergarten, so I was about five. My mom took me and I begged her not to leave me there. I was convinced it would be people being mean to me and huge amounts of homework to keep me from my family and TV. You say 'but how would you even know what homework is if you were 5'? I have two older brothers, whose mission was to destroy me. I think we all had a bit of fun, in retrospect.

5. When was the last time you sat on a park bench? Describe the event.

Central Park, NYC... a couple of months ago for Thanksgiving. The wife and assorted fam went to go ice skating in Central Park. Because I was in between knee surgeries, I could not indulge. So, I did some wandering and some bench sitting. It was a fine fine day.

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